Born on February 5, 1986, I am proud to be born in a progressive family that did not believe in female infanticide. I am proud to be born in a country where I have ladies like Sarojini Naidu, Rani Lakshmibai, Mother Teresa and Jhumpa Lahiri to look up to. I am proud to be born in an era where women are given equal opportunities as men. I am proud to be born a woman.
But I don't feel this pride when I walk down the road. On the contrary, I feel ashamed; ashamed of being born in a family that taught me to ignore the injustice being rendered to a woman, walk past it and have a sound sleep without any sense of guilt, ashamed of being born in a country that is addressed as 'Motherland' and yet one in every ten women walking down the road is a reported rape victim (the thought of the number of unreported rape victims makes me shudder in fear), ashamed to be born in an era that talks of equal opportunities in the same breath in which it gossips about a dowry death. I am ashamed of being born a woman.
Both I and my brother stay alone in Kolkata. Yet, my family is comparatively more worried about me because I am a girl-child.
I stopped at a shop today on my way back home. Another girl came to the shop as did two boys. In a matter of seconds, the girl became an object of sexual desire from being an absolute stranger. The only factor that stopped me from beating up the boys and reporting them to the police was the girl's refusal to lodge a complain. It seems that she did not desire trouble.
Was she entirely wrong in her approach? A legal system that makes me feel insecure instead of protected! After all, how many police-women do we encounter?
Women, for centuries, have stood at this crossroad, and continue to stand. On this side of the line they are mothers and sisters who are respected, friends who are loved and colleagues who are revered. On the other side of the line they are rape victims, dowry victims, objects of lust, use and disposal, mere bodies where the soul no longer resides.
And God save the woman who decides to break all rules on both sides of the line - she is the eternal bitch!
Why blame men alone? They are merely one side of the coin. Women, themselves, are no less responsible for their predicaments. A 'mother' teaches her son that men are born superior to women, a 'mother-in-law' immolates her daughter-in-law when she refuses to kill the goose that lays the golden egg, 'female relatives' hush up a girl's rape in fear of a scandal.
And all of this is happening all around me, every single day. But what am I doing about it, except write a few lines? Do I deserve to be proud to be a born a woman, much less a human being?
