From Delhi to Bombay (I still can't call the city Mumbai!) to London to Kolkata, it's been a long journey. Five years I have been willingly out of the house; five years I have been leading the life of a vagabond. Where is my home, you ask? Where my heart is, I say. Where is my heart, you ask? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...I have no answer.
The fact is that my heart longs to be in a place where every person who matters to me would be present. But let's face facts! It is next to impossible. All lead their own lives; all have their own priorities.
Since joining my friend in his dream - VISUALTHEQUE - today is possibly the second most important day in my life. The first was when VISUALTHEQUE signed its first contract. It wasn't a big project, but it was a project close to our hearts and it was a start. Today, because VISUALTHEQUE got its first cheque. And how many people do I have around me to share this and celebrate with? None; none except my friend and his mum. And the rest who make up my life are scattered. Thanks to modern technology, I have informed them all. Yet, I feel alone.
Sitting at a Cafe Coffee Day, sipping on a Mocchachillo, I have no one to share my excitement with and to see it reflected in their eyes. At the far end of the Cafe sits another man relishing a cake alone. Is he too celebrating or am I reading too much between the lines?
There are so many times when we quiz friends, "If you could ask for one thing, what would it be?" Some one please ask me that question right now; I know the answer.
congratulation Nilofer :) happy for you
ReplyDelete@ Jataveda: thanks :)
ReplyDeleteOne thing that I would ask for would be be this, "What the hell would make me happy?!!;" Cos am never happy! I am perplexed with me!
ReplyDelete@ Anonymous: Since you have not mentioned your name, I shall take the liberty of calling you 'Friend'. As for your question, I am no psychiatrist or mind reader so I do not have an exact answer. But I do know that more often than not, we spend our time thinking and not feeling. Thoughts should be a result of emotions and not the other way round. This is the reason, I believe, we create unnecessary pressure on ourselves. Try to let go. Feel the things around you. What were the things that made you happy in your childhood? Do those memories bring a smile? Live life, at least once, according to your wishes and don't give a thought to whether it is right or wrong, whether people expect you to do it or not. Just answer one question to yourself: Do you want to do it? Would be curious to know if it reduced your perplexity.
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